What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?

Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.

Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.

Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.

Did you ever accidentally have sex with your brother/sister in India?

Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!

Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!

Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?

What are tips for weight loss?

Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.

“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”

Marijuana makes Jesus cry!

Why do only ugly women like me on Tinder? Is it because I'm an ugly man?

Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!

I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.

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The Aging Brain: 6 Things You Should Be Doing to Slow Cognitive Decline - CNET

Shameless vixen! Trollop!

Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.

But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!

What is one small habit that has transformed your life in unexpected ways?

Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.

Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!

In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …

Why isn't bestiality illegal in most states? If children can't consent, then animals DEFINITELY can't consent. Why is being a pedophile a crime but zoophilia is not?

Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.

I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.

And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.

What were some of the unforgettable incidents from your school life?

Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.

After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.

Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!

What should I do if I love someone who does not love me?

Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.

Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.

In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …

What are some very specific groups of people you just cannot stand?

¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!

Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority

Make Nazis afraid again!

Summer here, the one who debunks atheism. Isn’t it funny how atheists always say they prefer a “no-nonsense, evidence-based approach” to understanding the world, but when I bring up logical arguments for theism, they suddenly clam up?

And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...

At least until the peyote kicks in ...

Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)

Can a dental anesthesia injection cause nerve damage? After receiving an injection in my gums I felt a sharp tingle going from the gum to my lower lip, and now sometimes I get a bit of itchiness and discomfort in my lower lip. What is it?

Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …